Hmmm...

My update for today isn't super happy, but since I mentioned it previously I thought I should bring some closure. My grandmother passed away yesterday, and I have to say that I am grateful that it wasn't a long, drawn out process in hospice. I can't imagine that would have been good for anyone, least of all my grandad.

But - here's a question that I've been thinking about. I know that grief affects different people in different ways. I wasn't terribly close with this grandmother, due to geographic distance, but she's the one I looked forward to visiting most and who I used to exchange letters with when I was a kid. Still, we would literally go months without contact.

So, shouldn't it logically follow that if you're not super close with someone - even a family member - that you're less affected by that loss? I'm only asking because I feel strangely out of sorts today and I don't really feel justified attributing that to the loss of a grandmother I haven't seen a couple of years. But nonetheless, I feel hypersensitive, my head hurts, my focus isn't stellar and I kinda want to cry. It just doesn't make sense in my own too-logical head.

There's nothing that needs to be done, I don't need to fly out there because there won't be a service. I am still thinking about trying to make a trip out there in May - maybe my dad will be ready to go back again at that time. I have to think that my grandad would still enjoy the company, and it might be good for me, too.

Anyway, that's it for today...thanks for the good thoughts and the prayers sent this direction. I guess it's one more life lesson/experience to add to the collection.